Inspirational Funny Quotes
These inspirational funny quotes will tickle your funny bone...
Weekends Don't Count Unless You Spend Them Doing Something
“Weekends don't count unless you spend them doing something completely pointless.” ~Bill Watterson
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continues to ruin my life.” ~Bill Watterson, The Complete Calvin and Hobbes
“I know I am good for something, I just haven't found it yet.”~Anonymous
“Laughter is a Medicine with no Side Effects!!!!!” ~Anonymous
Knowledge Versus Wisdom
“Knowledge is knowing that a tomato is a fruit not a vegetable. Wisdom is knowing not to include it in a fruit salad.” ~Anonymous
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lived through some terrible things in my life, some of which actually happened.” ~Mark Twain
“I'm not afraid of death; I just don't want to be there when it happens.” ~Woody Allen
“The future ain't what it used to be.” ~Yogi Berra
“Reality continues to ruin my life.” ~Bill Watterson
“The trouble with being in the rat race is that even if you win,you're still a rat.” ~Lily Tomlin
“I'll try anything once, twice if I like it, three times to make sure.” ~Mae West
"Quotation is a serviceable substitute for wit.” ~Oscar Wilde
“One of the advantages of being disorganized is that one is always having surprising discoveries.” ~A.A. Milnn
If You Don't Know Where You Are Going
“If you don't know where you are going,You will end up someplace else.” ~Yogi Berra
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say that life is the thing, but I prefer reading.” ~Logan Pearsall Smith
“I think I've discovered the secret of life -- you just hang around until you get used to it.” ~Charles M. Schulz
“My one regret in life is that I am not someone else.” ~Woody Allen
“You live but once; you might as well be amusing.” ~Coco Chanel
"Life is hard. After all, it kills you.”~Katharine Hepburn
“How can I go forward when I don't know which way I'm facing?” ~John Lennon
“You're on Earth. There's no cure for that.” ~Samuel Beckett
“Do not take life too seriously. You will never get out of it alive.” ~Elbert Hubbard
“When all else fails, there's always delusion.” ~Conan O'Brien “Two wrongs don't make a right, but they make a good excuse.” ~Thomas Stephen Szasz
“You can never get a cup of tea large enough or a book long enough to suit me.” ~C.S. Lewis
“People who say it cannot be done should not interrupt those who are doing it.” ~George Bernard Shaw
“I love mankind, it's people I can't stand.”~Charles M. Schulz
“The trouble with having an open mind, of course, is that people will insist on coming along and trying to put things in it.”~Terry Pratchett
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